One size fits all

The Finkleshine's had been in tailoring since Adam and Eve had suffered a cold snap in their nether regions and Gilbert Finkleshine had started his career as a sock draw sorter.
However times were changing, Gilbert's competitors were dwindling and he was dwindling with them.

Gilbert's son was a scientist and having witnessed the subservient life of his parents decided to try his hand at Genetics, moulding people rather than the other way round.

One day he took his father to one side and said 'Papa your problems are over'

Gilbert twitched. He had heard this phrase before when Mrs Finkleshine had told him she was pregnant.

'Papa' said his son 'I have designed a pill that will produce a fur for twenty four hours, it can be a mink for ladies, Otter for swimmers, Gorilla for trapeze artists, Polar Bear for arctic explorers (and holidays in Scotland) cats for Lloyd Webber, lions for Disney'

'Ok, Ok,' said Gilbert 'but who would buy and what would we charge'

'We will charge the earth' said his son. 'And the rich will buy just to be different and ahead of the hoi polloi'

It was a money spinner beyond Gilbert's and Mrs Finkleshine's dreams of wildest avarice.

The press and media went mad.

Models could once again display furs on catwalks giving animal rights protestors no rights to protest. Red paint sales dipped.

Finkleshine's Famous Fur Pills changed hands at prices akin to National Opera tickets.

Then disaster struck, reports of two legged zebras being shot by poachers in Africa. Incompetent gorillas began falling out of trees and odd looking chimps were being caged by zealous zoo keepers. Dancing bears forgetting the twenty four hour rule had suddenly appeared starkers in the Vatican, people previously thought to be polar bears found frozen solid at the North Pole. Strange looking Otters begging for fish in fountains and much, much worse.
The Finkleshine's decided it was time to go, taking their own specially designed, exclusive, camouflage fur pills they slipped away unnoticed, clutching their Swiss Bank Account numbers.
Occasionally they appeared in public half way up the east face of the Jungfrau dressed in Yeti but mostly they lived a quiet, happier if not a little duller lifestyle…